Open the Gate to Never Say Never

What does it really mean to say no and never?

Sometimes, these two words close hundreds of doors without us even knowing why.

We think we understand and know why we make the choices we do, but deep down, perhaps we don't. Or perhaps we do, because to a large extent, we follow society's rules and norms in order to feel that we belong to something bigger.

We say no because it is expected of us.

We follow the mainstream because we want to fit in.

But what happens when the things we automatically reject are actually opportunities waiting to be explored?

What If We Allowed Ourselves to Be More Playful?

To remedy this and feel freer, we can start by learning to laugh more and smile more — without needing a reason.

Because if we are going to be happy and playful, there will always be someone who is annoyed by our joy.

Yet a smile can give a thousand in return.

And that is truly worth it.

When “Never” Becomes a Wall

That incredibly powerful word “never” can sometimes be dangerous to say and to carry within us.

Of course, it is smart to say no to certain things that can involve a risk to our lives. But beyond genuine boundaries and safety, how often do we reject something simply because we have already decided that it is not for us?

Some people are driven by adrenaline and find it almost impossible to say no to new experiences. On the other side are those who say no with the greatest possible conviction and certainty that it is the only right way.

But is it really what they want?

Or have they simply followed the same path for so long that deviating from it would mean admitting that there might, after all, be more?

Sometimes the Barrier Is Smaller Than We Think

Consider something as simple as being invited to a themed party.

What we wear is actually just pieces of fabric sewn together. Yet we can allow something so simple to control us and make us miss an opportunity to have fun.

Perhaps the invitation feels outside our comfort zone. Perhaps we question the people attending or the idea itself.

But where is the danger in saying yes?

Why not wear a cowboy hat?

Why not wear nothing but green clothes?

Why not simply participate and see what happens?

Sometimes the door we refuse to open is not locked at all.

We have simply convinced ourselves that we shouldn't walk through it.

The Gate We Built Ourselves

Open up the gate that you have barricaded with chairs, tables, a hundred padlocks, and keys you have either thrown away or forgotten the codes to.

One step at a time.

As children, we were often more open. But as we grow older, we can become increasingly influenced by the way large numbers of other people think.

The longing and need to belong takes over.

We want to fit in.

And slowly, without noticing, we can build barriers around ourselves.

But the gate is still there.

And perhaps it was always meant to be opened.

What Would You Learn If You Said Yes?

Learning and curiosity can take us into unexpected places.

Quantum physics.

Cutting trees.

Milking a cow.

Building an igloo.

Balancing on a narrow tree trunk slightly higher in the air than we thought we could manage.

Architecture.

Helium balloons.

Deep-sea fish.

Growing our own tomatoes.

Writing poems.

Composing a song with our own lyrics.

What about saying yes to them?

Every new area we explore gives us the possibility of learning something we did not know before.

Learning and insight open doors.

Every Day Creates Another Opportunity

The gate or door you find yourself behind is meant to be open.

Exploring life on different levels and within different areas is a wonderful gift that we received the day we took our first breath.

Every day creates new opportunities and chances to grow.

We can do it.

You Don't Have to Know the Destination

My daughter dropped out of school and set off into the world, trying many things before eventually deciding to train as a preschool teacher.

We never know what is really waiting for us out there.

Sometimes the path only becomes visible after we start walking.

We Are an Ongoing, Living Sculpture

The other day, I decided to start writing a book about all the lessons and insights that life has given me.

And I realized something important:

We are an ongoing, living sculpture.

No one is a finished model.

We are the longest project we have to work on and with.

Perhaps that is why the word “never” deserves another look. What we say “never” to today may become something completely different tomorrow.

I Would Never...

I would never get tattoos.

I now have four, and I am so proud and happy.

I would never get pets.

For the past two years, we have had two Ragdoll cats.

I would never work in the school system.

Since this spring, I have been working at a secondary school — and I have a great time.

Three clear signs that this idea of never saying never can take on a completely different meaning.

So who knows what else is waiting for me?

When I try, I find out.

And that is an important part of life.

Open the Closed Gate

There is more we can try than we think.

Open the closed gate.

Let curiosity awaken.

You may feel freer.

You may feel braver.

And you may discover that the life waiting on the other side is very different from the one you imagined.

Try.